給我一點評價。[原]

無名小子

My Home
My Home have some room.For Example:living room,bedroom...
I always cook in my kitken, I like cook very much,because I think food can
make people happy.

Every　ｍｏｒｎｉｎｇ，I go to the park,the park is near my home.I go there to do a sports.I like
play game.

On sunday ,I play badmiton with my sister.

I like badmiton very much.

If you want to have a heathly boby, you must  do more sports.

[发帖际遇]: 無名小子给云中鹤擦背，擦中腋窝,扣工钱银两22.

我是美金

不是kitken，是kitchen。
不是do a sports 應該是 do some sports。
還有下一句 I like play game 和上一句沒有聯繫吧？而且like後面加動詞ing
單詞多個拼錯。

可改為：
My Home
My house have some room.For Example:living room,bedroom...
I always cook in my kitchen, I like cooking very much,because I think food can
make people happy.

Every　ｍｏｒｎｉｎｇ，I go to the park,the park is near my home.I go there to do some sports.I like playing games (I like playing sports).

On sunday ,I play badminton with my sister.

I like badminton very much.

If you want to have a healthy boby, you must  do more sports

無名小子

謝謝你,,,提供的意見...

yuenanchi

洋文。。。。。闪。。。。。

[发帖际遇]: yuenanchi暑假期间在洛阳绿竹巷参加《任盈盈琴箫兴趣班》，学习中级课程，报名费银两35。

zipang

看不懂拼音的飘过。。

bonnzhang

可以改为如下：

My Home

There are some rooms in my house.For Example:living room,bedroom...
The kitchen is where I cooked and I do it very often. I like cooking very much,because I think food can bring people happiness.

Every　ｍｏｒｎｉｎｇ，I go to the park near my home to do sports. I like doing sports very much.

On Sundays ,I usually play badmiton with my sister. Badminton is one of my favourite sports.

If you want to have a healthy boday, you must  do more sports.

楼主是要写关于自己的家的文章吗？感觉你写的只有第一段和家有关系

無名小子

不是...大主題是my home ,可小分為你在假期有什麼做的。

註:在我一,二年級的作品-.-"只有70分。

[ 本帖最后由 無名小子 于 2009-5-2 10:47 编辑 ]

987124

......看见英文就头大......

[发帖际遇]: 987124发现石破天准备用银票擦屁股，赶紧送上两卷草纸，换回一张银票，兑换银两28。

無名小子

-.-還有誰可說給我聽呀-.-"

[发帖际遇]: 無名小子偷得虚竹身上的美女图卷轴，卖给段誉，得银子银两42。

燕行

晕    能发中文吗       谁谁谁    把它翻译出来

燕行

翻译与修改    既然lz已经发上来了    我就勉为其难的批改下吧



我的家
    我的家有几个房间（room 改为rooms）。例如（Example干嘛大写啊）：客厅、卧室........
我总是在厨房做饭（I always cook in my kitken 难道有人在客厅做饭？ 个人认为这句话不要较好），我很喜欢做饭，
因为我认为食物能让人愉快。  
    每天早上我都去我家附近的公园（改为I go to the park near my home）。我去那里做运动（do a sports改为do some sports）
我喜欢玩游戏（game改为games）。
   
    星期天的时候，我和姐姐（或妹妹）打羽毛球.
    我很喜欢羽毛球。
    如果你想有一个健康的身体（改为If you want to be in good  heath），你必须做更多的运动。

魏小迪

这是英文，中国人起码都知道“哦K”（OK）WC……等等。

用户名已更改

写的太简单 就不替你翻译了

[发帖际遇]: 用户名已更改遭遇四大恶人,奋力拼搏,得到银两16两银子

無名小子

My Home
There have many rooms,for example:bedroom and living room.
I like cooking very much because I think the food can make people happy.
Many children don't like do sport ,they think sport do not imprant and lazy.
Sport can be more strong. Have  heatly  boby,you will be happy.